The Seeker

A Meta-Cognitive Journal About Writing… Plus Other Stuff

Dear Sam’s Club,

with one comment

I’ll be plain with you: the only reason I’m a member of Sam’s Club is because Costco is too far away. My sister assures me that I can be a member on her extended plan for free because she works for Costco; however, I have declined her offer on several ocassions because the nearest Costco is too far away for it to be practical for me to shop there. I have encouraged her to offer the freeness to someone who would make better use of it than I.

“Making better use of it” is what I’m writing about, Sam’s Club. I would like to see you make better use of the personnel you have guarding the entrance to the Gurnee Sam’s Club. Surely you can find a better way for him to earn his wages than by having him check if every person who enters the store is a member. This policy is so asinine that I have decided to make a sport of defying it. I walk right past the guard; sometimes I look at him when he asks me to show my membership card. I usually quip, “Oh, no thanks. I already have one.”

See, Sam’s Club, I don’t have to be a member to shop at your store. You specified that I can shop the pharmacy and the liquor department without being a member. So, I don’t need your guard stopping me– he can just assume that I’m going to either the pharmacy or the liquor department. In fact, if you continue with this policy, I most likely will be using goods from both locations in tandem to help me forget how ridiculous and unnecessary it is for you to stop me and ask me for my membership card each time I come to your store.

Sam’s Club, have you ever visited your Vernon Hills store? It’s nice. It’s clean and the staff has had a pleasant demeanor on the few occasions I’ve visited. Guess what? They’ve never asked me to show my membership card at the entrance. If this policy is so important, why is it so different 10 miles south of my local Sam’s? I’ve noticed that it seems fewer minorities shop at the Vernon Hills location. Does that have anything to do with the difference in policies between the two stores? Are there more minorities at the Gurnee location, so you have to make sure everybody is legitimate?

Will you at least promise me that you will train your guards so they know why they are stopping every person who enters the store? I’ve asked them why they stop me, and they have answered, “We’re just supposed to. To be sure you’re a member.” I don’t have to be a member! Remember? My sister explained to me that your policy is probably a matter of keeping the competition at bay. You don’t want them to come in, analyze your prices, and make adjustments that make it harder for you to sell your merchandise. But what’s to keep me from doing the same thing if I’m a member? Surely you can’t stop me from reporting your price on the 12-pack of Le Seur Peas to the suits at Costco corporate headquarters in Issaquah, Washington. Besides, can’t a competitor get on your website and check prices?

My sister also said that people try to sneak by without a membership card. They will ask to borrow the card of the next person in line, or try to con a manager into letting them through “because I forgot my card at home.” Here’s an idea: Don’t let somebody do that. If he screwed around in your store long enough to shop and then tries to sneak by, call the cops. Have them make a record of the trespass, and then ban the perpetrator from the store and put his name on file so he can’t get a membership. Society will take care of itself; pretty soon, word will be out that you don’t mess with Sam’s Club. But I’m not like that, Sam’s Club– I have a membership. So why do I have to be subjected to your ridiculous rule that implies that I am the type of person who would trespass and take advantage of you? I especially won’t tolerate it when it is different 10 miles south.

I hope you think about this, Sam’s Club. You can expect me to continue to walk right past your guards so long as you insist on maintaining an unnecessary, arbitrary rule that is disrespectful to your honest customers.

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Written by seeker70

February 4, 2009 at 3:27 am

Posted in Sam's Club

One Response

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  1. Can you also throw in there a “Dear Borders” letter, telling them to go suck on their policy that now demands you have to have a receipt to return books? Customer Service is dead…

    Cory Fosco

    February 5, 2009 at 1:33 pm


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